This poem was originally written last year in 2020, when I was taking a class called “Writing as Experiment” with poet Prof. Franny Choi. It was published with other poems in the chapbook I wrote, feel it all, which was shared with my classmates but never posted publicly. In the original version, there was a period after “break through me,” and “so why do i feel so sad?” was not in parentheses and is tabbed to be further on the page (Medium doesn’t allow for this); I have just added the parentheses as I’ve never been sure if I like this ending. There are many poem that I’ve written that don’t feel done/complete, and so I’m hesitant to post